October 24, 2013 /24-7PressRelease/
-- Unfortunately, not every marriage ends in a happily ever after. Divorcing is usually stressful - both financially and emotionally - for the married couple, as both have to go through the difficulties of property division, spousal support and so on. A divorce is no easier for children, who often don't understand the circumstances that led to their parents' splitting up, and who have witnessed their safe, predictable world changing forever.
It should come as no surprise that something as devastating as a divorce can have lasting effects on a child's emotional well-being. Depending on how the parents treat each other both during and after the divorce, it can make the difference between a child developing lasting problems into adulthood, or healing from the split and adapting well to a new life.
Parental involvement is crucial for children's happiness after divorce
Divorce is by no means uncommon in Florida: Our state has the fifth highest divorce rate in the country, according to WPBF 25. A very large amount of divorces affect Florida children each year. The Florida Department of Public Health reported about 30,700 divorces in the state last year that affected at least one minor child.
To help kids adjust smoothly to a divorce, parents need to stay involved in their lives and cooperate with each other, says Help Guide. It can be tempting to continue the bickering that contributed to the end of the marriage, especially during the first few weeks or months after a divorce. However, in order to keep children from feeling like they have to choose sides, it's important for parents to act civilly to each other in front of the kids. Mothers and fathers should support their children's time with the other parent and refrain from saying negative things in the parent's absence.
Kids will naturally have many questions during a divorce. Keeping answers honest and straightforward in an age-appropriate way will go a great deal toward rebuilding trust and helping them understand the divorce is not their fault. Rather than shocking a child with a sudden, unexpected divorce, parents should speak with kids to prepare them before any life changes are actually made.
Understanding how kids feel
Psych Central says kids will go through a broad range of difficult emotions during and after their parents' divorce. There are a few common feelings that most children of divorce share:
A need to try to fill in the gap left behind in a split household
A feeling of identifying more with their same-sex parent at first
Feelings of guilt or needing to take sides or mediate their parents' disagreements
Sometimes a desire to live with the non-custodial parent after a while
It's important to remember that these feelings are all normal as children adjust to their lives after a divorce. The key is to reassure them that they are still a part of a loving, stable family - it's just different from what they knew before. Listening and encouraging kids to share their feelings, setting routines and making sure kids know they're loved can all help to ease the transition.
Getting help from an attorney
Even with the best intentions, divorces don't always go smoothly. Divorcing couples often need the help of an experienced attorney to help settle child custody and support
disagreements. An attorney will also know about valuable resources and services to help parents with the difficult task of getting their children safely and happily through a divorce.